May 29, 2003

back into the fray

I flew out of Boston yesterday on my way back to sunny Seattle. I hate flying. People on planes are stinky. All of them. And the smell of stinking people makes me feel like there are other terrible things besides smell which are seeping into my skin. But yesterday the flight was a little better and I have TV to thank for it. As I was waiting in line to go through security I couldn't help overhearing the conversation going on between the three men behind me. It was mostly about their hotel stay and work and the lack of available food in the airport. One went to find the nearest Dunkin' Donuts and left the other two with his big metal equipment boxes in addition to their own. Being the kind and helpful individual that I am I offered to tug one of the boxes along as the line progressed through the terminal. I noticed a name tag with a picture of the Dunkin' Donuts guy on the box. Next to his picture it said "Junkyard Wars Crew." Then I noticed one of the other guys had a Junkyard Wars logo on his T-shirt. So I was in the presence of TV personality. I immediately got sullen and bitchy (because that is of course the only way to deal with celebrities.) The conversation starter was my removal of the kick-ass Titanium Powerbook that Alex lent me. The Junkyard boys were impressed and wanted to show me theirs as well. When the third guy came back he started ribbing his friends, playing the celebrity card. "Do you recognize this guy from TV?" I played it cool, "No, do you recognize me from TV?" Then they knew I was not to be patronized. Hehehehehe. I guess the lessons I've learned from all this are: 1) Now I'm old enough to flirt with celebrities, and 2) Flying is much more fun if famous people are flying with you. Celebrities, what can't they do?

Posted by liz at 01:48 AM | Comments (1)

May 14, 2003

sickness unto boredom

It's been over a week. Part of that is my intense slackarity. The other part is illness. I hate it. A lot. "It's just a cold." I have to keep saying that, but it seems a gross misnomer to me, mostly due to the sweating and fact that my head feels likely to simply detach and float away. But it's just a cold. So of course I have to work. I took monday off, and slept, all day. Which sleeping of course made tuesday more difficult. Tuesday morning found me in a DayQuil induced haze trying to correct all the work that was done in my absence on monday. It also involved angry calls from many people who found some mistakes before I got to them. But now it's wednesday and all my work is done. It's 11:13 am according to my computer and I will have to continue to sit here for another seven hours while my body slowly burns up from the inside until I am reduced to a pile of professional administrative ashes smelling faintly of metho-lyptus.
Granted, there are a few other factors contributing to the mood. When I get sick I suddenly feel like it will greatly improve my immediate health if I stop doing all the terrible things that I do to my body on a regular basis. So I have not smoked cigarette one, nor set foot one in any bar, nor drank a single cup of caffeinated goodness. Cold-turkey withdrawal from three vices at once with a simultaneous cold is not something that I would recommend to anyone with more resposibilities than, say, a four year old.
When this day is over I'm going home and crawling into bed and I absolutely refuse to do anything even remotely productive. Except maybe shower. But that's it.
It's pretty likely I'll be posting again once the second dose of DayQuil kicks in, unless it does that funny vision thing again. Grrrrr......

Posted by liz at 07:42 PM | Comments (1)

May 05, 2003

Precious Gifts

The chronicles of my transformation into a recycling bin:

When I first moved into my tiny studio apartment on Capitol Hill I did not possess thing one, other than my clothes, a few books and a guitar. The first few weeks involved some disturbing revelations. There were many last minutes runs to Fred Meyer for things like can openers and a shower curtain, sponges, dish rack, etc. The helpful people from my office began offering whatever they had lying around. First my intrepid and illustrious boss-man gave me a stool/table thing and a jar of peanut-butter. Then came the deluge: box spring and mattress, bath mat, dish rags, microwave, curtain and offers of couches from everywhere.

Since then things have tapered off. I'm now quite comfortable even without a tv set. However, my boss continues to shower me with totally random bits of equipment. It started up again with a 5-disk changer, a fabulous gift, but better if it comes with a receiver. I do not have a receiver. There are no available speakers in my apartment. But I do have a lonely 5-disk changer sitting on the floor taking up room and collecting dust.

Next, a salt and pepper shaker set shaped like a dog and doghouse. Very cute, I like dogs, but the doghouse is missing the cork to seal it off and in the amount of time it would take me to go out and find a cork that fits I could easily steal 4 salt and pepper shaker sets from any restaurant in town.

So today he walks up with a plastic bag and says something about his continuing effort to supply me with electronic gear:

Boss-Man: Here. I'm giving you a cordless phone. Take it home with you because you know how I hate clutter.
Me: Thanks alot, but um, I don't have phone service in my apartment. I just use my cell.
B-M: That's not my problem.

So I thought about selling it on e-bay but eventually just gave it to Andrea. The B-M is now offended. And I think my head may explode.

Posted by liz at 11:08 PM | Comments (4)

May 02, 2003

hey hey, it's the first of may! outdoor fucking starts today!

Actually, the first of May still has not brought any outdoor fucking in my general vicinity, but it has brought an outbreak of the most outrageous gossip and prank-monkey behavior to most of my office. It may be sunstroke, or just irritation at being cooped up working on a day like this but the sum total of the behavioral anomalies today is:

1) Debbie is walking around (and currently meeting with clients) with several paperclips in her ponytail (unbeknownst to her, of course. And courtesy of Jeff Parker.)
2) All of the agents were threatened with disembowelment by wild animals if they chose less-than-wise passcodes for the copier. (Courtesy of me.)
3) Alaina quit amid much rumor and speculation.
4) Shavic never showed up all day long. And there was much rejoicing! (Or at least a conspicuous absence of whining.)
5) Andrea received (and then forwarded to me) several emails from some twisted friend of hers, detailing the sexual positions and tricks he has, so far, persuaded his...um...well.. she's definately female...to do.
6) There is still a pot of Easter Lilies stems in the corner of the lobby but the flowers have disappeared since yesterday.
7) I finished everything I was supposed to do today in a timely fashion.

So May is clearly off to a bizarre (in a fun way) start. Can't wait for tomorrow though. I'm going to start drinking now...

Posted by liz at 02:00 AM | Comments (3)